Let’s talk about that strange stage of life when the front door stops revolving, the snack drawer actually stays full, and your kid’s laundry no longer multiplies like rabbits on spring break.
Yep. You’re officially in “they’re about to leave for college or finally did” territory.
And while everyone keeps telling you “Oh, what an exciting time!”—you’re just standing in the kitchen staring at the microwave thinking:
“What… now?”
The Secret Nobody Tells You
You’ve spent the last 18+ years making sure everyone else was OK. From wiping butts and Band-Aids to science fair disasters, braces, prom, and pulling together vacations where the only R&R you got was ten minutes alone in the bathroom—door locked, Target candle lit.
You made it. They’re semi-grown, or at least they can microwave mac and cheese without setting off the smoke alarm. But now that the dust has settled, here comes the silent killer…
You’ve forgotten how to want things.
I’m serious. Ask someone at this stage of life, “What do you want now?” and you’ll get a mix of blank stares, anxious laughter, and practical answers like “stability,” “a quiet house,” or my favorite: “I don’t know. Is it too late?”
And here’s the thing—I hear this every week from clients in their late 40s, 50s, and 60s. Smart, loving, responsible women and men who gave their best years to their families… and are now quietly wondering if that was it.
Cue the Abraham Hicks wisdom:
“You never stop desiring. You just get better at suppressing it with logic and fear.”
You didn’t stop dreaming. You just got really, really good at replacing your dreams with duty.
Mel Robbins Said It Straight
Mel Robbins reminds us:
“No one’s coming to save you. It’s up to you to push yourself.”
Translation? No one is going to knock on your door and say, “Ma’am, it looks like you gave up your needs for two decades, would you like your dreams back?”
But you can knock. You can decide that now that the house is quieter, the real you gets a microphone.
So let’s challenge some myths you’ve been conditioned to believe:
MYTH: You should be grateful with what you’ve got.
✅ Yes, gratitude is powerful.
❌ But it’s not a life sentence. Gratitude is the foundation—not the ceiling.
MYTH: It’s too late to change careers or start something new.
✅ Time has passed.
❌ But YOU are not done. In fact, your wisdom, grit, and “no BS” filter make you a walking goldmine of potential.
One of my clients, Beth, told me after her last child left for college, “I thought I’d finally feel free. But instead, I felt lost—and guilty for feeling lost.” She had no clue what she wanted anymore… until we started digging. Spoiler: she’s now building the coaching practice she buried 20 years ago under diapers and school runs.
MYTH: Wanting more is selfish now.
✅ You gave your all.
❌ Now it’s your turn. Wanting more is the most loving thing you can do for yourself—and your kids watching you.
That “Fake But Real” Wall
There’s a wall many people hit in their 40s, 50s, 60s. It’s not made of bricks—it’s made of years.
Years of practicality.
Years of "being responsible."
Years of your inner voice whispering, “Not now.”
Years of "just get through this week.”
Before you know it, that wall feels real. But it’s not.
It’s just built from thoughts you’ve repeated so many times they feel like facts.
Abraham Hicks calls this “offering a vibration by default.”
But you? You’re learning to offer one on purpose.
Another one of my clients, Diane, had a high-paying marketing job she’d held for 17 years. Great benefits, flexible hours, remote work. But every single day, she told me, “It’s like I’m quietly dying inside.” She’d normalized the numbness. Today, she’s two months into a nonprofit project that lights her up. She didn’t need permission—just clarity and a system to take action.
Let’s Bring It Home (and get a little rebellious)
Now is not the time to stay on the path just because it’s familiar.
If your job gave you a lifestyle but sucked the life out of you, it’s OK to want more. If your routine feels like leftovers from 1998, toss the Tupperware.
You’ve raised a family.
You’ve shown up every day when it was hard.
And now… it’s YOUR turn.
But if you're waiting for the perfect time, stop.
The perfect time doesn’t come.
The decision creates the time.
(Another Mel Robbins mic drop. Can you tell as a coach, I too have my go to coachings for inspiration.)
Tim’s Life Design Tip:
Do one "selfish" thing this week.
Take a walk alone. Book a class. Write out what your dream Tuesday looks like if no one needed anything from you. Not what’s practical. Not what’s expected.
What’s true.
You’ve mastered responsibility.
Now master receiving. Go ahead and do it, I dare you!
Next Step? Pour Your Favorite Beverage and Join Me.
Seriously—grab a glass of wine, a LaCroix, or that weird organic beet juice that tastes like regret. Then register for my free 75-minute masterclass that’s changing lives—especially for people in this exact season of life.
And yes, you’ll hear my full story—how I hit the wall, broke the “practical” spell, and used three key shifts to completely rewrite my life after 50. You’ll walk away with those same shifts—ready to apply them to your life right now.
